Writings on the Wall

Do you write on your bathroom walls? I am referring to the ones that are in your home. I am going to guess that you don’t. So why do people write on the walls in public bathrooms?

Let us start with why do you have a pen on you while you are there? Do you take it for protection? Some people have a fear of public restrooms, and it may comfort them to have a pencil, pen, or a permanent marker that smells like green apple. I would be terrified to be confronted by that marker. If it is not one you for protection than why is it on you?

What people write confuses me too, “for a good time call XXX-XXXX”. Um, if your idea of a good time starts in a bathroom, I think I will take a rain check although I am sure you are a lovely person. Then there is the whole “Ashley Bartley is a major backstabber. DO NOT TRUST HER!” Thank you for the advice. I will stay clear of Ashley; I didn’t think you could trust her to begin with. I think my all time favorite is, “Leslie + Adam = Tru Luv”. Wow. I don’t know about the rest of you, but I am pretty sure that if my boyfriend found out I declared my love for him in the bathroom he would be grossed out.

I will admit that it is a great form of entertainment for the person who is using the facility; however it also makes me think of what idiots these people are. I have yet to travel into the mens room and read their writings on the wall.

Woman Attacks Polar Bear

Actually, the news article is titled “Bear attacks Woman in Berlin Zoo”. I first saw this on CNN.com and could not resist seeing what it was all about. Before looking at the article I imagined that the bear had escaped and went after this zoo spectator, but that was not the case at all.

The woman jumped into the bears’ habitat! She climbed the fence and then proceeded to jump in the water, during feeding time. The article ended with how the woman was severely injured. Well duh! What moron jumps into a fence with wild animals during feeding time? Let me tell you this, no sane person watches a polar bear and thinks “you know that water looks so refreshing and that polar bear looks like he could use a play mate. Oh, is that fresh fish?” Not one sane person!

I thought it couldn’t get any worse, but oh it does. The article states that it is unclear why the woman entered the habitat. Oh My God!!! Whatever reason she gives would be unclear. I will give you a reason; it is called 15 minutes of fame. I can guarantee that this woman will be interviewed by Good Morning America or the Today Show.

If we should feel sorry for anyone it should be the polar bears. You watch the video, they look completely confused. They are simply trying to eat a pleasant meal and then a woman of perfectly good meat is tossed their way and then taken away. This lady disrupted their day. Hopefully she is banned from all zoos.

To Whom It May Concern,

(I have no intention of ever sending this letter to Mega bus)


I will start off with a compliment because my mother taught me it is always best to start out with a compliment. Your prices are the best I have seen, so thank you for that.

Now, I have to say I was quite disappointed with my trip. When I paid for a Mega-bus ticket I thought I would be travelling on a Mega-bus. What did I see when I arrived at my bus stop at Penn Station? A bus that was anything but mega. It was just a regular old Greyhound bus. If I wanted Greyhound I would’ve climbed aboard with them.

I wish I could say that was my only complaint, but alas it is not. I don’t expect this mode of transportation to be first class, but the bathroom was also not mega. It was basically a porta-potty. Do you know how terrifying a porta-potty is for a female, especially one that is in motion? You try and go to the bathroom with the fear of a bump and then a splash!

I know this may sound like a bit much also, but you have an entertainment system built into the bus, why not use it? It can be quite boring to just sit there and look at the passing traffic. Why install the system if you are not going to use it. Do you know how many bored children there are in America who would kill to have that system? (Something for you to think about when you lay your head on your mega pillow.)

Thank you for your time.

Sincerely,
Chelsea Callahan (A Mega Unhappy Customer)

IT'S JUST A SEAT!

Do you remember in high school when you were assigned a seat? Remember when you sat in the back of the bus because it was “un-cool” to sit near the front? What about the cafeteria, when certain groups had a table? Those days should be behind us, right?

In fact those habits are still with us. You sit on a certain side of the café and never go to other. I walked in there one evening with a friend and put my belongings down on an empty table. She asked if we could go to the other side because it was cooler (and I am not referring to temperature). I am sure you are aware of the “Baseball Table”. This is the table on the farthest side that only the baseball team sits at. I have the urge to sit there and throw them off.


Then there is the beloved Valiant. Watch other students; some will always go right for the back no matter what, even if it is completely empty.

I would be lying if I said I wasn’t guilty about seat territory. I take a film seminar and since the beginning of the semester I have sat in the same seat. About two weeks ago I walked into class and another student took it. I won’t lie I’m pissed. I should have seen it coming he kept moving closer to it, but I didn’t think he would actually take it. I thought it would be like a one night stand, but he continues to sit in it. I have a plan though, I am showing up ten minutes early to reclaim the seat. I don’t know why I care, it’s just a seat

Duplicity: Return of America’s Sweetheart.

Where the h*ll has Ms. Julia Roberts been? She left movie-goers with the likes of Vanessa Hudgens and Megan Fox (who is quite attractive but in no way comparable) to make babies and be a house wife. Shame on you Julia, shame on you.


Roberts stars with Clive Owen in this comedy/crime/thriller about two corporate spies who join together to pull off the ultimate con job on their bosses. All the while maintaining a steamy relationship; this could ultimately destroy the job.

The beginning is a bit slow, and almost makes the viewer want to get up, yell “Seriously, what is going on here”, and leave. However the $13 that you just spent is quite the incentive to stay put. Staying put is good too because once you get past the half hour mark the film is entertaining and funny. The ending, which if you were like me I would reveal it because I hate surprises but you probably wouldn’t appreciate it, is completely unexpected. It is not like one of those romantic comedies where the two will have a fight and realize that despite their differences life isn’t complete without one another.

Positives: entertaining plot, Clive Owen in a towel, comical, unpredictable ending, return of Julia Roberts, and Clive Owen in general.

Negatives: Julia Roberts looking old and disastrous during the first scene (they clean her up, don’t worry), and slow beginning.

It is clear that the positives outweigh the negatives in this film. I won’t go see a movie around here because of how much they charge, but this one was worth it.

Hallmark: The Spring Break Holiday...

Well for me it was anyway. While most of the students at Manhattanville went home or some place sunny, I was spending my days at Hallmark in the Westchester. It was completely my choice to do so.

I enjoy my job. I don’t enjoy the customers. The word that comes to mind when I think of them is “Rude”. They yell at me for stupid things. If they can’t find a card they like, they seek me out to tell me “you have a terrible card selection”. Excuse me? If you look on any card it does not say “By Chelsea Callahan”, and if you don’t like it then please leave. Customers also get offended that we don’t wrap gifts or validate parking. If you have enough money to be shopping in this mall you should have no problem with the parking fee. Also, it is not my fault you waited to the last minute to wrap your gift.

Customers look for the weirdest things when shopping. They often ask for party materials like balloons, plates, and napkins. I suggest politely trying Target. The expression on their face is priceless. One would think that I threatened to kill their purse dog. They act like their reputation will be destroyed if they even look at Target let alone step in there.

I am not saying that all my customers are like this but a good majority. This blog could be advice to those who read it, don’t be rude to sales associates. We talk and make fun of you if you are. My friends often joke, “How hard could your job be?” It isn’t hard; it’s unpleasant especially with the children of the devil, i.e. customers.

Bad News is the Best News

When it comes down to it, bad news wins over good news. It’s what the people want, or least what I want. Please do not misunderstand me. I am all about a light fluffy story about a grandmother who was saved by a five year old boy, but give me a nanny who murdered the wife to run off with the husband and left the baby in the highchair any day.

Bad news is exciting and unexpected. It is out of the ordinary. It provides conversation. If I mentioned a boy who saved a family of squirrels to my friends in order to start up a conversation, I feel they would look at me like “What the hell are you talking about?” If I bring up a twelve year old cheerleader who got pregnant by her thirty-five year old coach, well we’ve got a good time.



It is a little sad that the negative overrides the positive, but I feel that our society has become that way. You meet someone new and if there is something you don’t like about that person it overrides what you could like about that person.

Negativity is extremely powerful. It is interesting that people try to push a positive attitude on others hoping that they will catch it (side note: what does that even mean catch? It reminds me of the song catch a falling star; which is impossible)


A negative attitude is more contagious and can spread a lot faster, so why should the news be any different?